The Award for Oral Sex goes to…….

I had been flirting with this white, red haired boy all day. Stuck out of town on a business trip and awaiting an award ceremony, I was looking for some excitement. He was the lucky one I chose from a recently placed Craigslist ad while away on a business trip. For some reason, hubby was adamant about no black guys that night. Annoyed, but wanting some anonymous dick, and quite frankly, some attention, I chose this guy. Just like most white guys, he talked about his love of giving oral sex. Well, knowing what I know now, that is usually code for “I have a small dick.” Or “I can’t get or stay hard.”  Oh well. Let’s see where this goes. Hubby hadn’t been in the habit of allowing me to play alone, so this was particularly exciting!

Leaving the mandatory, boring, all day seminar, I went back to the hotel room for an hour of leisure time before I had to get all gussied up for the upcoming award ceremony.

When out of the blue, my gentleman texts me and asks to come over, right now, before the ceremony just to lick my pussy. What?? Like, right now-right now? “Yes, he says. I can be there, my Queen, to bring you to orgasm with my tongue in 15 minutes.” Hmm… now that sounds nice and this is so spontaneous and exciting!

Assuming that he would never show up, as most don’t when you make plans with Craigslist dudes, I called him on it. “Ok. Let’s do it. Room 303. Residence Inn.” And I waited. Anxious. Cleaning up. And rebelliously, deciding not to give my hubby the heads up that he was on his way over. That made it even better, daring, rebellious.

14 minutes later, a tap tap on the door. No shit! He showed up! I looked through the peep hole to make sure he was there alone. And, petrified that a co-worker that was also staying at the same hotel would see a strange man entering my room, I opened the door and hid behind it, coyly. And quickly ushered him inside.

He was tall. Red hair. And came in a suit. Not a full suit but the vest, tie etc. He didn’t speak. Feeling shy, I said hello and sat back on the bed. He stood to the left of the foot of the bed, back towards me and face in front of the floor length mirror. I watched him very methodically, very slowly unbutton the sleeves of his shirt. Not making eye contact with me, he unbuttoned his vest. Slowly undraping himself from the vest around his midsection, he carefully folded it in half, and specifically laid it out over the length of the bench that stood in front of the mirror.

The man in a suit on a black background.Special film grain.Special Concept style, processing.

This was a test of my patience. I was mesmerized. Making me slow down and take my time. I was on his time now. He made me slow down. He made me wait. I touched my body, breathed in deeply over and over, touching my pussy and watching him.

He was surely making this a process. An experience.

He slowly unbuttoned his shirt. And with precision took it off gently and again laid it, ever so particularly, over his vest.

And then he turned around and faced me. He did not look me in the eye but looked at my body. It was when he turned around that I saw the hard-on in his pants. That made me happy and excited. He got down on his knees on the floor at the foot of the bed, embraced my upper thighs and buried his head in my pussy. His touch was soft and methodical. He may have been severely aroused but he did not lose control.

He was good. He took his time. He licked every part of my clit, my lips, my hole. Up and down and around and around. My hips began to undulate towards his face. My fingers found his hair and pushed his face in between my legs. He ate and ate and ate. And I found myself having a hard time holding back. God, I wanted him to fuck me.

My clit became enraged with blood and tingling. Tingling throughout my whole body. I could think of nothing else but the next suck of his tongue on my clit, the next lick of his tongue around the outside of my clit, teasing me into orgasm.

I shuddered and gasped. I moaned loudly. So loudly as I gushed and came all over his face. He lapped it up faster and faster and I heard him exhale and moan. I begged for his dick.  He slowly removed himself from between my legs, stood up. Dick still rock hard. And I asked him to fuck me.

He stood over me, grabbing my tit and playing briefly with my nipple. He bent down kissed me and said; “Not just yet. Later tonight.” And he placed himself back in front of the mirror to gown up the same way he unfurled before me when he arrived.  I laid there, relaxed and feeling wonderfully.

He left the hotel room. I dressed for the award ceremony. Not putting a stitch of clothing on under my long black sequenced dress. Ready for him to return.

He never returned.

Reminiscing about the story with my hubby later that night, I secretly dreamt that he would come rapping on the door just one more time. No we don’t have to talk. I will spread my legs like butter and you will please your Queen with your tongue. No words needed.

Vibrator Reviews! LYLA Rabbit via Topco Toyz

You know it’s going to be a great day when you get a vibrator in the mail!

20151227_173758-1 (1)


Thanks to Topco Toyz, ( leading retailer in everything sexy, I get to try this out and tell you how it made my big, wet pussy feel.. and might I add…I FREAKING LOVE THIS TOY!!

I am not easy to please when it comes to vibes. They never seem to be strong enough or they don’t seem to hit the right spots.


LYLA Rabbit by Ultra Zone

The Ultra Zone LYLA 6x Rabbbit hits every spot I got! I chose the pretty pink color. To begin, it came nicely packaged and felt like I had made a solid purchase. It retails for $99.99 and it’s completely worth it!

The vibe itself feels like suede against your fingers. Add a little lube to it and its slip and slide, all day long baby!

This is a rechargeable vibe and came with a full charge and with a USB charger. I took it out of the package, turned it on and stuck it in.

The softness of the outer coating was very pleasing. Ultra Zone’s LYLA 6x vibrator is easy to work. It has 6 functions of vibrations, and multiple speed options. It did seem a little tricky to move to the various speeds, but whatever speed I found, was perfect and was certainly strong enough.

I have used this vibrator several times in the past week and that is saying a lot. I have low tolerance for vibrators that don’t work perfectly. I have a box full of ones that I used once and tossed aside. Not this one though!

There were two things about this vibrator that I specifically liked. This vibrator, and no other vibrator, stimulated that special spot, my pee hole…or urethra, as professional folk might call it. This was an amazing feeling! I can’t pinpoint how this device did that exactly, but it touched that spot EACH and EVERY time.

The other thing was that the clitoral tickler was the perfect length! It was easy to stimulate my clitoris. With other vibrators, it seems like they either hit a bit too high above the clitoris or don’t quite hit it at all. The Utra Zone LYLA 6x Rabbit, sold at, hits every spot you need!

If you are ready to land $99 for a vibrator, you will be very happy with this one. This vibe is staying in my top nightstand drawer for easy access.

Click on the banner above to get yours today!

Homeless Natives Need Pussy Too

It all began on business trip up North. I was feeling lonely and rammy and received permission to place an ad on Craigslist for a little business trip dick.

Let’s start by saying his picture didn’t resemble him a bit by the time he showed up.

Not knowing that at the time, I was excited by this handsome 30 something man’s picture and the fact that he was Native. I had never slept with a Native before and I heard they had nice, thick dicks. So, woop woop! This was a win win. I imagined he would look something like this:


The first warning I failed to heed was that he had no car. “Ok,” I said to myself, “I shouldn’t be so judgmental. Taking public transit is good for the environment right?”

The second warning I failed to heed was that he couldn’t arrive until after 1am. He was working until midnight at a local pizza shop (so he said) and then, of course, there’s the bus ride to my hotel….. (red flags blazing fully ignoredI).

My first glimpse of him was him leaning over an ashcan, putting out his cigarette outside the hotel’s side entrance He was at least 15 years older than his picture. Or, if it wasn’t that old, it was a HARD several years since that photo had been taken. He had hair much longer than the photo provided and he came to the door carrying a back pack. (I guess that’s understandable if you’re using public transportation….still, it felt odd)

Since it was almost 2am when he finally arrived, I told him I would meet him at a side door of the hotel. So, there I go, slinking down in my sexiest (but acceptable to be seen in public) clothes and I catch this glimpse of him at the door. My gut instinct was: “Oh. Well, he doesn’t look at all like his picture. Maybe I shouldn’t be doing this”

He caught my eye, so there was no way of getting out of this now. Maybe I will be pleasantly surprised?

I escort him to my room. He comes in, sets the bag down and begins to unload at least a six pack of beer into my hotel fridge. I notice his shirt is dirty and I begin to smell a faint whiff of clothes that hadn’t been washed in a while.

“Homeless? Really?” Is all I could think. Well, maybe he’s not HOMELESS per se, maybe he’s just a bachelor. (It is amazing how I can rationalize things or I’m a total whore who wants dick any way she can get it).

He cracks open a cold one and GUZZLES it. Like, I mean guzzle. As if we were junior high students in a race out back by the playground.

For a second, I actually become a bit afraid. Here I am, out of town, away from my husband. My husband isn’t even awake to help me should I have a problem with this guy. And, then I realize how risky this is meeting strangers on craigslist.

But, before I start to freak out, I figured I would just let this ride out for a bit and see what happens. He hasn’t actually DONE anything that would make me feel this way. This just hasn’t been how my typical encounter plays out.

He offers me a beer, and he sits on the other bed, far away from me. For a moment, I wonder if he’s not physically attracted to me. Maybe that’s our problem?

We converse about nothing for a while and then I decide to move to the bed next to him. I cozy up to him and he begins to rub my thigh. Good, I think to myself, at least I can see there is some interest here.

He is totally into music. He asks me to change the slow jams I have playing and proceeds to show me video after video of bands like Cold Play,Creed, ACDC etc. And he is TOTALLY into it. When the music is playing, this guy is standing up and playing air guitar and singing. I almost thought we would never fuck, because he was SO into this music. We went on and on listening to music, as I tried to seduce him.

Now, this is the annoying part. I want to be the one that is seduced, that is desired, that makes men lose control. And here I was trying to get laid by this long haired, socially awkward, native guy and I still hadn’t seen his dick.

By now its almost 3am and I ask if we are ever going to fuck. He says: “Ya, let me just down a couple more beers..” and the music lesson continues.

3 beers later, he is getting frisky and I decide to lay on the opposite bed. Finally, he moseys over to me, never making eye contact. He stands over me, hair falling in his face (actually he’s not a bad looking guy), beer in one hand, head bopping to AC-DC playing in the background and he begins to run his finger up and down my leg. Slowly, not looking at me. I realize he rarely looked me in the eye at all. There was something dark and sad about his person. I laid back and took in this unique experience. His finger ran the length of my thigh, from my ankle to my pussy, up and down over and over, slowly and sensually.

He slurped another mouthful of beer, spread his hand over my inner thigh, moaned at the softness of my leg. Touching, grabbing, caressing the fullness of my thigh.

He was actually worshiping my body. Putting the beer down, he proceeded to use both hands, to caress my calves, my legs and even put his cheek on my thighs to feel the softness. I surrendered and assumed I would be safe with this man. He did not appear to mean any harm, but was unsure of himself until he had enough alcohol in his system.

He kissed me passionately, careful, slow, soft kisses around my ears, my neck, my cheeks, teasing me into submission. He told me how much he loves curvy women, how soft I felt, how turned on he was.

Then he took off his clothes. And I was not disappointed.

For a small body of a man, he had a substantial appendage. I don’t remember it being too short or too long, but I do remember it being substantially thick. Not too thick that I couldn’t get my lips around it and do a fairly good job at fellatio, but thick enough. It looked great and was hard as a rock. All I wanted to do was to suck on it, forever and a day.

We had a great session of fucking. Passionate and different, with different moves than I was used to, at a different speed. It was slow and methodical and caused me to slow down and go at his speed. This was one of the few times that I felt a man truly cherish the way my body looked and felt. He looked at my body a lot. To the point that it made me uncomfortable, until I decided that I think I’m beautiful too and I would let him soak me up for the small amount of time that he had me.

This man was a vulnerable man. A man with a past. With hurt in his eyes and in his bones. During our time, before and after fornication, he talked about his parents and his daughter and I realized that he never saw either one of them often. Sadly, he probably ruined ties with those people he obviously loved, probably due to his drinking problem. But, despite his lack of contact with his 9 year old daughter, you could tell that he deeply loved her. I wondered if she knew how much he loved her. I wonder if his parents (who lived in the same city) knew how he would talk about them over and over again with a complete stranger.

It was when we were lying in bed, me snuggled under his arm, listening to the music he chose to play when he said to me, out of the blue, with no reason:

“Shot gun.”

Alarmed, I asked him what he was talking about. He replied:

“I had a shot gun in my hand and I was ready to end my life.”

In that still hotel room, after sharing his body with me, he shared his heart with a complete stranger. He explained how he had decided to kill himself, told me how he had the gun positioned, what he was thinking, why he wanted to end his life. To a total stranger he opened up and shared dark secrets.

It’s as if he just needed someone to talk to. Someone to listen. Someone to not judge him. Someone he would probably not see again.

I, in turn, had just shared my body with him, was vulnerable to keeping myself safe.

I listened. I didn’t judge. I didn’t condemn. I listened.

By now, it was nearly 4am. I knew that my 2 hour limit playing was ticking. I also knew he wanted to stay over, that packing up, getting dressed and WALKING home (since there was no bus service at 4am) was probably not what he wanted to do.

But, I didn’t want him to stay any longer. It seemed to be a heavy encounter for me and I needed to lighten my load.

Walking him to the door, he kissed me and left. Unabashedly, shamelessly, into the dawn-kissed morning. Alone and perhaps, if I had any positive affect on him, with a little lighter of a burden on his shoulders.

Sexually satisfied and tired as hell, I passed out on the bed.

The lingering smell of day old clothes hung in the air.

I checked out several hours later.


Lazy Sunday Transforms to Best Friend Threesome


boys and girls

It’s been lingering for quite a while, a constant flirt when all three of us are in the same room. The look in my husband’s eye when he’s next to me and my best friend is sitting a little too close to him. You know his secret fantasy would be to fuck both of us.

But, my experienced swinger husband is a little hard to impress. There are not many sexual rendezvous he has not had, so that means there are not too many things that really impress him or turn him on.

Until, the one comment he made in bed late at one night, when my friend was passed out drunk in the guest room next door: “Having you and your best friend at the same time sounds totally hot!”

Oh reeeeeeeally??

Fast forward about six months.

After watching a great football game at a local bar, the three of us came home and found ourselves all in the same bed, feigning sleepiness. We contemplated going to the local fair, but all decided we wanted to “nap”. He was strategically placed in between me and my best friend. I mean, what place could be better? Soft, curvy, bit-titted wife on one side, pushing against his bare back; and my spicy, short, big-assed Asian best friend cozied up with her back towards his dick.

He was instantly hard.

Seeming restless, she exclaims: “I can’t sleep with my bra on!” And proceeds to disrobe. Trying to put her shirt back on, he tells her to keep it off and we spoon like a perfect trio. My hand runs along her hips and on her belly, hoping to sooth her. His hands cup her breast.

We rest. I contemplate. No one makes a move. I keep thinking.

She wouldn’t be laying here with us if she didn’t hope this turned into something else. And both would be worried how I felt about it, neither of them wanting to be the one to make the first move. He would be worried that I may think he wanted her more. My best friend could think I would be mad that she wanted to fuck him. So the onus was on me to make the move.

I took the lead: “Girl, come on. Let’s get on this dick!”

It took about 2 seconds for my husband to whip off his pants, laying there, fully erect, looking sexy as hell. My friend twirled around and I started sucking his dick. I had already gotten naked. She slipped off her pants and came down to take turns deep throating that big, thick, black dick. Throbbing, harder and longer than normal, all veiny and pulsating, I couldn’t get enough. We devoured that man.

I released the dick to her mouth and watched her, in beautiful fluid motion, not hesitate for a moment to deep throat that dick- that dick that belongs to me. I wanted to kiss her while we were giving him head. Not sure how far this would go directly with her and I, I hesitated.

Next thing I knew, she was flat on her back and my husbands hard cock was drilling down her throat. This was my chance to pounce. I gently touched the inside of her thighs and they opened like butter, sweet cream, soft butter…I looked up and I can see his beautiful fucking ass clenching as he rams that dick in her throat. She can’t even gag, he is so far down her throat. I can hear her moan as I spread her lips and find her clit with my tongue. She’s soaking wet and just the thought of me sucking on my best friend’s clit, 20 years my junior, makes me cream as well.

We’ve all been waiting for this moment for a long time.

She cums all over my face. Legs twitching, moaning, almost screaming if she didn’t have that dick in her mouth.

He unmounts from her lips and moves me out of the way. I crawl up next to her and begin to caress her. He rubs his dick over her pussy making her squirt all over him. Feeling a little uncomfortable, I start to lick on her nipples, wanting to bring her as much pleasure as I could. Perhaps this is the only time this will happen and I want her to dream about it for years later.

Next thing I know, my husband lays on her and puts his arm around me, pulling me into him and he kisses me. Pushing my face towards her, we kiss. Then all three of us kiss. She has big, full lips and we make out like teenagers. My pussy, at this point, is dripping like a fucking faucet.

Deciding to grab some toys out of our toy box, my husband jumps off the bed and heads to grab the duffle bag with the Hitachi…


hitachi (2)


And that is at the precise point that our menage a trois is foiled!

“There’s someone at the door!” He says.
What?? Of all the years that we have wanted to do this, of all the times, someone just decides to stop by our house???? Are you freaking kidding??

We consult our phones and see a mutual friend has texted all of us… “I know you guy are home. Why is no one answering their phones?”

Oh shit. A decision has to be made.  Do we stop the threesome before we are all satisfied so that we can maintain this false facade with our friend or do we keep going, assuming he will eventually give up and leave?

I declared: “We are not going to stop fucking. Make sure the doors are locked and get back in here.”

He complied and we took out the Hitachi and he used it on me first. My friend was a little afraid of it’s power, and I was more than  willing to comply to be used as a guinea pig. All I really wanted was for her to lick my nipples while my husband used the toy on me. Not wanting to push her young ass into doing something she didn’t feel comfortable with, I didn’t lead her.

Before I know it, she’s got one of my big ass titties cupped in her two hands and sucking the shit out of my nipple. I explode faster than I’ve ever cum before, cumming all over that toy. When I cum, it is no quiet thing either. Writhing in ecstasy, sounding sexy as hell, I let the orgasm wash all over me for both of them to witness.

She takes her place on the bed and experiences the joy of this toy.

Meanwhile, our unexpected visitor is still in his car, waiting. Little does he know all the hot shit going on just feet away from him inside the house. Little does he know the hot fucking taking place right outside his field of vision.

We finish our romp in the sheets and scurry around, creating the perfect alibi for none of us answering our phones.

Wonder Twin Powers Activate.

The rest of the story:

It was the kissing of two best friends laying in front of him that made him shoot his load before even entering her. A man that has solid control ALL of the time could not hold his cum back when he watched these two best friends tongue kissing. Cumming all over her pussy and the sheets, he lost control and grabbed for the toys. The licking and the sucking and the amazement he felt that this was actually happening caused him to lose control.

My best friend and I relished in the fact that we were so juicy hot that he came in an instant.

Now, THAT is power.

Pure Power.

Wonder Twins Power, Done Activated!



Fresh Off the Boat Sex

I couldn’t decide between two titles for this post. The first one was “Fresh Off the Boat Sex” and the competing, and ever so accurate title of “Worst Sex I’ve Ever Had.” Fresh Off the Boat won just because it seemed a bit more racier and maybe would catch your attention.

For those of my readers that are familiar with, or may be part of a household of immigrants, you will know what I’m talking about here in a minute. You know those Asian parents that stick to the Old Country ways? The ones that came here when they were in their 30’s and never really assimilated?

I know these types of parents, and was part of a household with folks like this and I swear they never have sex. They never show any affection or even act as if they even like their husband or wife. They dress differently. They smell differently. They don’t speak English.

They can’t possibly have sex often right? And would NEVER imagine them having sex with someone other than their spouse.
Well, wrong.

I just had the worst sex of my life and it was from the man of a Middle Eastern couple. Really, the worst sex ever.

They approached us because he said (in very broken English) that he could not satisfy his wife. (No shit, Sherlock. I get it. I just had it. And it was terrible.)

The wife speaks no English.

They were super secretive. Couldn’t have their teenage kids figuring this out. They were supposed to meet us at a local grocery store coffee shop. We showed up. They were nowhere to be found. He arrived, without her, and ushered us to the parking lot to their car where we could meet in utter disguise.

There we are, crammed into a 1990 Tercel trying to have a conversation with those that want to fuck but don’t speak much English. That certainly was interesting.

Well, he spoke enough English to tell us, that although my husband’s picture was an accurate portrayal of his face, I looked much older than the picture I provided to him. “Must be a good photo.” He says. FUCK YOU, DICKWAD. Mother fucker. And, trust me, when I tell you this. I was a million times hotter than his wife. A million.

I was so pissed I was ready to get out of the car. I quickly ended it, hoping that we never had to consummate this relationship.

Well, those of you that have been reading my posts, know that my husband doesn’t really say no to any pussy (except maybe black pussy, or super skinny pussy). So, I was destined to have to fuck this asshole.

And, ya. It happened today. Like 20 minutes ago. I don’t know if it even should count as fucking. It was just that bad.

First off, their initial appointment with us, they were an hour late. We cancelled before they even got the whole way here. Foreigners. God, never on time. (Now, before you go and chastise me for comments that appear intolerant, please know that I speak several languages, and have immersed myself into several cultures transparently. Still, they’re always late and it’s uber annoying. Not a stereotype, but the truth.)

So, today they were early. Dammit. Then they started freaking out that we were going to videotape them without them knowing. Duh. This is stupid. If you don’t want to fuck, then go on your merry way. I literally said that and got a disapproving glare from my husband. I had just little patience for this shit. We aren’t the FBI. We aren’t going to video tape you. Besides, you are not that fucking hot for us to want to relive this shit. I GUARAN-FUCKING-TEE YOU.

The lady was dressed in typical Old Country dress. A full pant and long sleeve shirt underneath a full dress. Yup. Like double layer of clothes. Super sexy. (Rolling my eyes).



Knowing that the husband wanted to watch her fuck,I showed him the chair he could watch my husband fuck her. Told him to come into the adjoining room to play with me when he was ready.

Sitting on bed in the guest room, with my phone in hand texting my bestie about my predicament, I secretly hoped he would cum in his pants while watching his wife be fucked and I would get out of this.

(Oh! This cannot go without being said. The woman has only been with one man EVER, her husband. And the husband had only been with one other woman besides his wife. Just another indication of how this encounter was going to go. The typical scenario I find myself in all the fucking time:  the girl gets fucked like no tomorrow by my talented, sexy, big dick husband. And I get left with these stupid ass dudes with no game, can’t even kiss, can’t last more than a minute and leave me feeling completely and utterly unfulfilled. This is the story of my life. Here we go again.)

So, I sat and waited. I hear them giggling. My husband always laughs. With that beautiful smile. I hear her start to groan. Alot. I hear Arabic words. I hear her groans building. I wait. I wait some more. I continue to text my bestie, who is hysterical as I text her play by play updates.

I hear bags rustling.

Bags rustling?? Why the hell would bags be rustling? My bestie suggest: “Oh my god. They’re going to suffocate him!” LOL. Most likely not. Groaning begins. I am still waiting. Apparently he did not get suffocated.

I decide to go in and watch too. I like to watch my husband fuck. He’s so goddamned sexy. I hope he loves fucking me as much as he looks like he enjoys fucking these other girls.

As I go in, the husband then rushes in with me to the other room. Gets undressed. I glance at his dick. Ya, nothing to write home about. Small and not even hard. Skinny dude. Mustache. Mustaches creep me out. It’s like the old perverted Uncle mustache too. Not like a sexy mustache goatee on a Mexican or something.

He gets on top of me. He kisses me. It’s so weird. Like he’s never kissed before. All lip and no tongue. What the fuck? Oh please sweet lord, don’t let this last long. He grabs my boobs, but he like rolls them around all fast like, like he’s a 12 year old boy that doesn’t know what to do. Good god, really? He goes down on me and licks me for, oh, maybe 20 seconds then calls out to his wife something in Arabic. Annoyed, I tell him to go check on her if he would feel better. He gets up and goes in the room.

I go back to texting my bestie. And I wait……

and I wait some more.

Seriously? Is he not coming back? God, this is so fucking stupid.  Meanwhile, I hear balls slapping and know she’s getting her brains fucked out. Hear my husband moan.

Seriously, this dude was gone for like 10 minutes. That’s really long when you’re sitting on a bed naked (and annoyed).

He comes back in with a camera. Really? You were taking pictures when you guys were both earlier freaking out about thinking we were going to video tape you without your knowledge?? Stupid people.

I decide, lets get this over with. Hand him the condom, he puts it on and in. He lays real close, holding me and he fucks me. I guess he fucks me. I mean, I can’t feel anything, so who the hell knows. Yuck. So I make a bunch of sounds to get him there as quickly as I can for his to be over.

Ya, that took about 2 minutes tops. I encourage him to go back in and watch his wife. I left the room, got dressed and did some work. They kept fucking.

Working while you’re husband is BLOWING SOMEONE’S MIND is super annoying. I mean, I’m kind of proud because he is, truly, that good and this woman just HAD to have an amazing experience. So, I guess that’s good. But, the end of the stick given to me was short. Hopefully I made his day, but I’m left wanting.

Sometimes guys that don’t have a big dick or who can’t last long, have other things to provide. Usually it’s the touch, or the attention or good oral. Something. This time it was nothing. Nothing but a waste of time.

And for some reason has left me sad.



How Dare You Say No??

It frustrates me when I want to play and he doesn’t let me. It’s so hard for me to look at his rationale and to support it. Especially when there are certainly men out that that want to fuck. I don’t even care if I know them. They don’t have to have my phone number. They don’t even have to know my name. He can set up the entire thing.

I just want to fuck.

He sternly says no and I feel like a kid that wants to stomp her feet on the ground and pull at her pig tails.  You’re not my dad. How dare you say no?!  I’m an adult woman, an Executive. I shouldn’t even have to ask for permission.


As I try to subdue that irrational reaction, he accepts my repeated asks of: “But, why? Why not? Tell me why?”

He knows I’ve had a shitty day. I didn’t get a job offer that I was 100% sure I would receive. I am not feeling good and I’m fucking horny. But, basically, I’m just mad and I want to act out. I want to be bad. Being bad to me means either smoking a cigarette (a cardinal sin in my household) and fucking. Like a lot of fucking. Loud, nasty, messy fucking. And he says no.

Luckily, I have some brains and I hesitate before flipping out. And he gives in to my question. He says: just one look at your friend that showed up from out of town and seeing the dudes coming out of the woodwork firms up my feelings. If it would mean I have a chance of losing you, you’re not doing it.

{{Heart fluttering, anger dissipating}}

Expand on that, my dear. I need to hear it right now. Right this second. Tell me more about how you don’t want to lose me, Daddy. Tell me more. That will keep me right here next to you. Say it again. Don’t ever stop saying it. I need to hear it more than you know. Knowing that it’s not just a control issue with you, but denying my request stems from pure concern of somehow losing a grip on me.

It’s nice to hear. That you want to keep me. All to yourself. Say it often. I need to hear it before my tantrum erupts. You need to say it more than you realize.